I Found Out
“I told you before,” warned John. “Stay away from my door.”
“But, you — ”
“Don’t give me that ‘brother brother brother brother.’”
The visitor looked at him, not comprehending.
“The freaks on the phone,” John explained, “won’t leave me alone. So don’t give me that ‘brother brother brother brother.’”
“But John, I’m not calling you, and…”
“Ugh!” exclaimed John, who then announced: “I…I found out.”
The man at the door was mystified. “O-kay?”
“I,” John continued, “I found out.”
The visitor, whose name was Bobby, stood perplexed at what he was hearing.
The litany of grievances was still in the early stages. “Now that I’ve told you what I’ve been through, don’t take nobody’s word what you can do.”
Bobby racked his brain trying to remember what John had told him about his past. There was something about a cranky aunt, and maybe a merchant sea ship captain?
“There ain’t no Jesus gonna come from the sky,” said John, going there. “Now that I’ve found out, I know I can cry.”
Although he was not a callous man, Bobby worried John would dissolve in tears right there in front of him. “Hey, look, you know I — ”
“I!” exclaimed John. “I found out! I, I found out!”
“Well, good!” said Bobby, desperate now to get away without having to delve into what John had just discovered. “Well, I guess I gotta — ”
“Some of you sit there with your cock in your hand.”
Bobby wheeled around, nearly expecting to see some folks masturbating in the yard. There weren’t.
“Don’t get you nowhere,” spat John. “Don’t make you a man.”
“Yeah, maybe, okay,” said Bobby, while thinking, well, it does make you feel good though.
“I heard something about my ma and my pa.”
“Uh, yeah?” asked Bobby. “What?”
“They didn’t want me, so they made me a star.”
Bobby furrowed his brow. “Well, how’d they do that?”
John continued, as if not hearing. “I, I found out. I, found out.” It seemed like a refrain to which John was committed.
There followed an uncomfortable silence, but Bobby dared not break it. John seemed dialed in, almost as if in a trance.
“I seen through junkies,” John finally said. “I’ve been through it all.”
“Yeah?”
“I’ve seen religion from Jesus to Paul.”
“Heh, me too, I guess.” Bobby thought about that time he stood up in church at the wrong time and his father grabbed his neck and forced him back down.
“Don’t let them fool you with dope or cocaine,” warned John.
Bobby had never had anyone approach him with either.
“No one can harm you,” growled John. “Feel your own pain.”
Bobby thought about the painkillers he’d been trying to ween himself off of. But man, they just make me feel so much better! Damn this bursitis.
“I!” pronounced John, still strident and impassioned. “I found out. I, I found out. I found out. I found out.”
John seemed finally spent, his words trailing off.
“Well, that’s good,” said Bobby. “You still got that blender you were advertising on Facebook?
